


A Safe Haven

by fireandphoenix



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Red Robin (Comics), Under the Red Hood
Genre: All of the Batfam need to learn self-preservation skills, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Jason needs a hug, Sickfic, Tim is so done with all of his family, Tim needs a hug, Tim needs more sleep, jason is sick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-09
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2020-01-07 04:53:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18403505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fireandphoenix/pseuds/fireandphoenix
Summary: Okay, so maybe Jason sometimes goes out on patrol when he might or might not have a minor stab wound. And sometimes he might or might not have gotten said stab wound infected. And he might or might not have a slight fever caused by said infection in said stab wound. And  perhaps he got a little mixed up in which safe houses actually belonged to him and which ones belong to annoying Replacements.ORJason is sick, but having the famous self preservation skills of the Batfamily, he decides to go out on patrol anyway, which leads him to crash in one Timothy Drake's apartment.





	A Safe Haven

It had been a pretty slow night, but Red Hood wasn’t complaining. If he was honest, Alfie would have his head if he saw Jason patrolling in his current condition, but it  _ really _ wasn’t all that bad. The stab wound in his side was truly almost completely healed. Honest. 

Well mostly honest. It still hurt and the fact that it might not have been treated straight away didn’t help matters. By now the wound might or might not be infected, but that didn’t give him an excuse to slack off his patrol. Really he was completely fine. He had literally come back from the dead. There was no way that a stupid infection from a hole in his side was going to stop him now. He was the freaking Red Hood for crying out loud. 

He rose from the crouch position he had been in. Woah. The the rush of dizziness forced Jason to take a moment to regain his balance. Since when had the world become so blurry? Maybe there was just something wrong with his helmet. But slowly the world become more visible, and Red Hood was on the move again. Just because his helmet was malfunctioning did  _ not  _ mean that the villains would stop harassing Gotham.

As if to prove his point, a child’s scream echoed through the alleyways. In a flash, Jason in pursuit. Once he locked into the origin of the screams, he say three muggers cornering four children: an older boy, a girl about twelve, an eightish boy, and an infant. It was the infant’s screaming that he heard, and the muggers where yelling for it to shut up, which the girl was desperately trying to do.

At this point Jason had seen enough.  _ No one  _ tried to mug a kid on his turf. “Hey idiots!” He shouted leaping down behind them. He might have landed a bit harder than he should have, but at least it had the effect he wanted. All three pieces of trash whipped around to face him.

“Oh no,” one of them cursed. “I thought you said he was out of commission!” He yelled at his two fellow reprobates.

“Well he will be soon,” one of the others growled back. Luckily while they were distracted, the children had managed to slip away. At least he thought they slipped away. It seems like the mechanical malfunction in his helmet was back, and somehow it had managed to give him a train wreck of a headache.

“I would think that people like you would learn that I am never out of commision. I am your worst nightmare.” Jason gave a wicked grin, which of course they couldn’t see, but he was pretty sure they could sense it nonetheless. 

He whipped out his guns and proceeded to attack the idiots. However the helmet’s malfunction was making it hard to shoot straight, yet he gritted his teeth, trying to push through the throbbing in his head. There was no way he was letting these pieces of yesterday’s trash get away with mugging children on his watch. And since his aim was a bit off, he lunged at the scum in order to pummel them the old fashion way.

Unfortunately, they seemed to be smarter than most muggers he usually crosses and instead of trying to rush him all at once, they split up to try to surround him, so he couldn’t attack them all at once. Which was mildly inconvenient. 

“Can you try to kill me a little quieter?” He asked because their stomping around trying to surround him was  _ not _ helping his headache. However, despite his politely asking, they refused to comply with his wish. Instead they charged at him. Ugh. He easily dodged their first few clumsy attempts to stab him. However, he was glad that he was wearing a helmet to hide his grimace of pain because the Red Hood came back from the dead and there was no way he was going to let the whole world know about his stupid cold.

He landed a few good blows on each of them, but he was still outnumbered three to one. Normally this would be no problem, but he  _ really _ wasn’t feeling well. Was it bad that he was in the middle of a fight, but shivering from the cold? 

Jason let out a low grunt as one of the scum landed a lucky blow to his stomach. Normally he would have busted them up by now even with the absence of guns, but tonight was decidedly not his night.

“I hope you get coal in your stocking this year,” he yelled finally landing a series of good blows on his assailant. However, his movements were growing more and more ragged. This was decidedly not good. Eventually, even though they were clearly incompetent, they got lucky enough and landed several more blows, forcing him to the ground. They surrounded him again and rained down more blows. They seemed to particularly like kicking his head around, which quite frankly really,  _ really _ did not help his headache. 

For goodness sakes how many could there be? Red Hood could have sworn that there had originally only been three, but now he thought he saw at least twelve maybe more. And since when have common muggers have purple feet?

At this point, Jason thought a tactical retreat might be a good idea. With the help from a smoke bomb, he managed to escape to a nearby rooftop where he decided to make a tactical move to take a small moment to regain his strength. Just a short pause right?

Jason groaned as he realized that it was going to be a long trek back home. Well  _ home _ was a little too far away at the moment, so maybe one of his safehouses. Now where was the nearest one? He mentally ran through the list...and groaned. They were all too far away. He groaned again. Maybe he could just lay here. Lay here and die... _ again.  _ Well there were worst was to die right? Like getting beaten to death by a madman then getting blown up. Yes, this was decidedly a more peaceful way to go.

He groaned again. He couldn’t die because then who would save Gotham from the crazy bat? He gave a semi-hysterical laugh. If the bat was crazy did that mean he was  _ batty? _ A batty bat that was funny. 

Then he frowned slightly. Could a robin be batty? No. They must be robiny. Robiny? Yes, Dick was definitely robiny. Replacement was a bit robiny in his own way, but Jason, Jason was they robiniest of them all. He was the king of being robiny. He gave another laugh. He would have to have a crown to rule over his robiny peasants.

A crown. Where was he going to get a crown? Oh right, home. He vaguely tried remembering how to get home, but the only thing that was coming to mind was a house several streets over. Maybe he could find a crown there. 

The pain was washed away in his delirium, so he was easily able to swing over the few streets on his search for a crown.

Now where was that house. Ah, there it was. A perfectly normal house for a perfectly normal king. Now what was the password for this house? He vaguely remembered something about Live@Hawaii:BeRebellious. Now why would he choose such a dumb password? It was so long too. The rest of the security was just as convoluted, but he had other things to worry about like food. This stupid house did not have any good food. Like none. Nada. Zero. When had Red Hood ever leave a safe house unstocked? But for some reason he had a surplus of coffee. Like there was coffee flooding every inch of the cupboards. Who in their right mind would ever drink this much coffee? He frowned, but then shrugged. Maybe he had been going through a coffee phase. 

At the moment he had more pressing matters like turning the temperature to a normal temperature. But the thermometer must be broken because it said the apartment was 85 degrees. Jason frowned again and turned up the temperature because it was freezing in here. Maybe the thermometer was broken? Well, this safehouse definitely needed some TLC if it was going to cut muster with the King of Robinyness. 

Now where was the royal bed? He looked around, but his eyes only saw a couch. Well, that would have to do. 

Jason barely managed to remove his helmet before passing out.

 

* * *

 

It had been another long patrol, and all Tim wanted was sleep. But all he could do was give a bitter laugh. Sleep was always something that that was so tantalizingly close, yet so far away. Tonight was no different. He still had several reports to finish and trying to convince the board of directors at Wayne Entreprise that having a 17 year old as CEO was a good idea, and there were rumors of a new mob forming in the east side of Gotham. On the whole, it was going to be a long night. A long week? No, more like a long year. Yes, it was going to be a very long year. Surely there was some way to get around the whole sleep problem. Maybe he should invest some more into the if-you-drink-this-you-will-never-sleep-again coffee project that he had started last year.

Speaking of coffee, Tim crept through one of his windows, intent on grabbing at least one cup before starting on those reports, but why did his apartment smell like smoke?

His hand crept towards his bo staff. Had Jason found his apartment? Was he there to kill Tim again? All Tim could do was sigh. He knew he should have changed the passwords. He knew Jason must have known them, yet he didn’t change them. He gave another long and drawn out sigh that he hoped conveyed his absolute doneness with life at this moment. But might as well get it over with. And maybe this time Jason could do it right, and Tim would finally go to that peaceful utopia that so many people rave about.

He crept through the halls until the smell was almost overwhelming, and there laying sprawled out on his couch was a very much passed out Red Hood. In full costume. Minus the helmet.

Well this was an interesting development. It turned out that he might not entirely die tonight. And Tim couldn’t tell how he felt about that.

“I really hope you have a very good reason for breaking into my house, Hood,” He finally said prodding the mass of flesh. But Jason only let out a low moan and stayed passed out. Well better be safe than sorry, Tim thought as he pulled out a pair of Bat-handcuffs. He proceeded to cuff his predecessor. If fate was not going to kill him, then he might as well try to stay alive. Or at least make it semi difficult for Jason to complete his mission. When his hand accidentally brush Jason’s forehead, it forced him to stop.

Surely that was not a healthy temperature. Tim frowned. Now that he thought about it, Jason didn’t look that good, even for a semi living zombie guy. And him being sick might explain why he was within fifty feet of Tim and not trying to kill him. 

Just to make sure, Tim hunted a thermometer down and jabbed it under Jason’s tongue. 

“Well that’s not a good sign,” Tim mumbled when it read 102 degrees. Jason was obviously seriously sick if he ended up here. And even in his sleep, Tim could see slight shivers running down Jason’s body. Tim sighed and went to fetch some blankets to toss on Hood, at least for the present. Then he had to decide what to do with the unconscious body.

Hood was definitely too big for Tim to drag halfway across the city to Jason's own apartment. But he wasn’t sure if he would do it even if he could because Tim had to wonder about the morality of abandoning someone that was clearly this helpless. 

But then again was it moral to harbor a known fugitive, especially one that has tried to murder you more than once? And while they were on the topic of morality, was it moral to be a vigilante in general? Tim sighed. He was too tired for this. He needed coffee.

He looked down at Red Hood again. “Well, then what am I supposed to do with you now that you’ve upset my sense of morality?” he asked to a still unconscious Red Hood. “I hope you have a good excuse for crashing my house and ruining my dreams of a semi-peaceful night, and being sick doesn’t cut it!” 

He sat huffily down on a chair across from the unconscious maniac and pulled out his computer. “You better not interrupt my work because if you do, I will drag you out of this house and leave you for the police to find no matter how moral it might be.” Either luckily or unluckily depending how you viewed it, Jason did not seem to hear this last part.

 

* * *

 

Jason felt like he had been steam rolled by a truck. His entire body ached and became slowly conscious of the fact that he was still in his uniform. He could also feel his hands being restrained by something. His brain felt foggy, but it was still able to figure out the meaning of his situation. Obviously he had been captured. He tried remembering what had happened previously. Nothing. A whole lot of nothing. Well this was going to be fun.

“Please stop moaning.” The voice of his captor spoke up. Now why did that voice sound so familiar? Jason purposely let out another long groan. 

“Look,” the voice said again two parts exasperated and one part just plain tired. “I have work to do, so you need to shut up.”

Again Jason let out another groan that lasted about five times as long as it should have. It probably wasn’t a good idea to antagonize his captor, but he was never known as the smart Robin. He did admit that it was kinda funny when his captor shouted, “Seriously, do I need to come over there and gag you? I have work to do!”

The voice sounded young, younger than it should have, which made Jason frown. The voice sounded painfully familiar, but his muddled brain could not place it with any of the villains he fought. And from the sounds of it there was no one else nearby. Well that was a stupid mistake. 

Jason frowned as he tried to figure out where he was. Now that he was thinking about it, he was laying on something that was quite comfortable, not the cold hard ground. Also there seemed to be something covering him keeping him warm. This did not compute. Why would his captor bother to lay him on a couch or bed? 

He let out another groan, and this time the voice groaned too, and huffily the human behind the voice put aside whatever he had been doing to check on Red Hood.

“Jason, there had better be a good reason for me to stop what I am doing and check on you.” Red Hood lay frozen for a moment. Had his captor just used his name? 

Wait a moment the voice… Oh no… Oh nooo… This was not happening. This couldn’t be happening. Was he really in Replacement’s apartment? How did he get here. Replacement would never have been strong enough to defeat him, and he never would have come willingly, so… No, Replacement wasn’t that dumb, and B-man would still be around.

Jason felt a hand shove a thermometer in his mouth. He tried to spit it back out, but Timbo slapped him and shoved it back. When it was done, Timmers said, “Good, it is only 100 degrees now.

“What was it before?” Jason asked with a slight slur.

“It was 102 when I found you,” Tim said. “By the way, why in the world are you in my house?” Jason didn’t really have a response for that, so he just shrugged. “You didn’t even bother to crash at one of your many safe houses, or at least one of mine? Instead you had to break into my literal  _ house?” _ Jason shrugged again. Tim sighed.

After a moment’s silence, Jason spoke up again. “So you cuff me up but didn’t bother to remove my suit?”

Now it was Tim’s turn to shrug. “I didn’t want to get electrocuted.”

Jason hated to admit it, but the kid probably had a point. “Can you take these cuffs off me?” He growled because there was no way he was admitted his replacement had made any point at all. 

“Why on earth would I do that?” Again Jason had to admit that it was a valid question. Tim was obviously still annoyed about the last time Jason had tried to kill him.

“Fine, then could you at least get me something to drink?” Tim seemed to debate this, but ultimately he conceded and brought back a glass of water. “So how is this going to work?” Jason asked after he had drunk the water through a straw because Tim still wasn’t removing his cuffs.

Now it was Tim’s turn to shrug. “I don’t know. You were the one who I found crashed on my couch. By the way, next time you are too delirious to find your own home, give me a heads up. You almost landed yourself a crushing blow from my bo staff when I first came in.”

“Well are you going to turn me in?” Jason asked ignoring the last statement.

“I really haven’t thought that through. I was kinda focusing on finishing these reports then you decided to wake up.”

“Well I feel much better now, so if you would be so kind as to free me…”

“No way.”

“Oh come on why not?”

“Number one because you are  _ still _ too sick to be by yourself, and number two, you would most likely try to kill me...again.”

Jason could see the reasoning behind the latter point. “So I ask again, how is this going to work?”

Timmers didn’t even bother replying. Instead he just shrugged and continued to type whatever he was working on. Jason grumbled something about indecency and little children, but when it became clear that Timbo would not budge in the matter, he subsided. 

Instead he focused on sitting up and getting it for himself. Luckily Timbo had not really tried to incapacitate him other than the inconvenience of the cuffs. He did not dwell to long on the matter though. Tim did glance up with a hint of fear in his eyes when Jason first started to sit up, but seemed to mentally shrug and go back to his work. Jason grumbled again, but then stumbled to his feet and wandered to the kitchen.

He nudged a few cabinets open with his shoulder, but there was nothing in them. Neither was there anything in the fridge. He frowned. Hadn’t the kid said that this was his actual home not a safe house? Why in world wasn’t there any food here?

“Gez Replacement, don’t you have any food here?” There was no response. “Does Alfred know that you eating garbage?” This time Timbo sighed. 

“Of course he doesn’t.” Then a moment later he added, “And I have not been eating trash. Ramen is a perfectly acceptable source of food.”

“UH huh. I’ll be sure to tell that to Alfie next time I see him.”

“Tell him, and he will also hear about your treatment of the wound you had last month,” Tim said not looking away from his screen.

Jason almost smirked at this kid’s immediate response, then he paused, realizing what the kid had said. “And how in the world did you know about that?”

“Did you expect me to  _ not _ keep tabs on people who have tried to kill me?” The kid had a valid point, but still, it was kinda creepy. Speaking of creepy, was it normal for a child to drink this much coffee or get this little sleep? The answer was a decided no.

Jason walked back towards the kid and stood over him until he finally looked up. “Well...what do you want,” Tim asked a bit annoyed.

“Food.”

“There is food in the kitchen.” Tim said growing more annoyed.

“No, I want real food, and since you won’t let me go home, that leaves you to get some for me.”

“I am not going to be ordered around by a sick invalid. You were the one who crashed my house and interrupted my quiet night of paperwork.” Seriously did this kid ever sleep?

Jason could continue the argument, which anyone could see is pointless, or he could use a more effective method. He wisely chose the latter, so he removed the computer from the kid’s lap to his mild protests. However Jason continued in his endeavor.

“Get off Hood. You are going to make me sick!”

“Good! Maybe then you will stop working yourself to death,” Jason replied as he sank in deeper to his new seat. And given that the kid probably has at least a dozen baterrangs hidden within an arm’s reach, he was doing surprisingly little to remove Jason. He must be thinking that as long as Jason wasn’t actively trying to kill him, he could deal with it. 

They waited for a while in silence. By now Jason feeling almost completely back to normal (a side effect of the Lazarus Pit). However his replacement still had not freed him, so of course he needed to stay at least until he managed to get free.

The kid must have been exhausted because just after the few moments of inactivity, Jason could already feel his breath even out into the deeper breaths of sleep. Well that was easy.

Jason stood up and flitted through his replacment’s pockets until he came across the key to his cuffs. From there it was a simple matter to release himself and slip out of the apartment, allowing the exhausted vigilante to sleep after a moment or two of making sure that Tim would not wake up and think that maybe this had made their relationship any better.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Tim woke up to an empty apartment and his cuffs tightly secured around his wrists. “Oh come on, Jason! Really?” Even though of course it only took him a few minutes to free himself, the gesture of brotherly love was simply whelming.

However the next night he came back from another long patrol to find his entire kitchen restocked with food, with a note that simply said, “It’s not poisoned.”

Tim bit into one of the apples that was neatly stacked on the counter. “I really needed to change that password.” But he shrugged again. Eh if he got free food out of it…Maybe this meant that Red Hood will stop trying to kill him. And maybe that meant that he could finally get some work done.

**Author's Note:**

> Haha can someone please give these boys some self preservation skills!! They need to learn that when you are on the verge of dying, you do not need to go to defend all that is good in the world.
> 
> I was also thinking of having a series of oneshots revolving around the Batfam's zero self preservation skills. Tell me what you think.


End file.
